Mojo Hacks is a series from MiddleAgedMan.me, designed to help you get your Mojo Workin', in the shortest possible time. Sure, we all know that eating right, going to the gym, getting adequate sleep and meditating are the keys to a long and prosperous life. But who has time for all that crap?
Sunshine, on My Nutsack, Makes Me Happy…
So, look, you're a modern man with an internet connection. You know all too well that testosterone is, by and large, the thing that makes you a man. You also know that low testosterone is a contributing factor to nasty things such as hair loss, libido loss, Dunlap Disease (my belly “done lapped” over my belt buckle), and a whole host of other maladies that we're just supposed to accept as Middle Aged Men (MAM's).
But there's hope. Just take your frank and beans on a little beach vacation.
You see, Vitamin D deficiency is common in men with Low T. And countless studies have shown that moderate exposure to the sun can increase your T and get your House of Mojo back in order, at least a little bit.
At this point, I suppose it's my duty as a guy who writes about men and health and balls and whatnot, to tell you that diet and exercise play a crucial role in T levels. So the best advice is to get your ass up and start moving.
But it is with giddy glee that I can also advise you to whip out your Johnson while you're out there and give the little fella some sunshine (but not for more than 10 minutes, please).
I suppose, since we're doing the whole disclaimer thing, I should also tell you to be cautious about where you go about tanning your testes. For some odd reason, it seems to be illegal to whip out your junk in a park, at the pool, or at a woman's softball tournament.
Doin' it for Science!
I can't imagine why this study hasn't been reconstructed but, in 1939, a dude by the name of Dr. Abraham Myerson measured the circulating testosterone levels of a group of men and then exposed certain parts of their bodies to UVB light for a week or so. When the men's chests were exposed to the UVB, their circulating T levels went up by 120%.
I would have loved to have been there for the moment when Myerson thought, “Hey, let's point this light at their ballsacks and see what happens”. What happened, as it turns out, was a whopping 200% increase in circulating testosterone.
Unfortunately, the effect isn't a lasting one, fading back to normal levels after only a week or so. But the key takeaway here is that you should get yourself out in the sun regularly and often.
And my advice could probably have just stopped there.
But it's way more fun to imagine all of you sneaking around trying to find a secluded sunny spot to get all George Hamilton on your John Thomas.